my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Buhtt sex?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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