Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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