i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize