Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
