Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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