Reggie can tackle my bush.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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