Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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