i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
