so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
