hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Alive.
So much puke
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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