how can u be prego again
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
