he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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