Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
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