Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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