fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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