I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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