I bet he comes in French.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
