There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
