Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
