but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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