I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize
