did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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