dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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