I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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