sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize