barbara walters just said penis...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize