you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
