By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
