i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I need to sanitize my soul.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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