Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize