i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
