you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
