forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
this must be what syphilis tastes like
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize