the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
