Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize