Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
