You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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