i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He kissed a someone with a penis
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
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