# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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