I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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