when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
