I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
