It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
