sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Randomize
