me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
