Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize