I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
