you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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