Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
wow bdsm is so cute
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