Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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