No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
