idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
